Winter wonderland is in full effect outside my window. The winter storm everyone has been complaining about has finally arrived and the temperatures are below zero. Strong winds are raging at the moment and there are even rumors floating around about a potential power outage. Regardless of the current circumstances or what may come, peace and comfort abides in my home.
My mom is visiting for the holidays and for the first time in months, life feels so sweet. As I watch my mom debate over which movies to watch and my cat doing zoomies for the 20th time, my heart is full with joy. It’s quite a peculiar feeling to experience this joy while the harsh realities of life haven’t changed. My problems haven’t gone away and the transitional phase I am experiencing right now is hard. But this joy remains and it feels anchored in my soul.
Yesterday I walked away from one of the highest paying jobs I’ve ever had. Months leading up to my last day, I was worried, stressed, and uncertain of the future. God gave me a date in the middle of the year, when he wanted me to leave and although I had negative feelings about that decision, I put the plan into action. I chose to be obedient and act despite my feelings. It was a mental battle for me to rest on the promises he spoke over my life instead of trusting a paycheck. Trusting God instead of a check sounds like a cute statement to say when you are not experiencing any trials. But when he disrupts your plans, requesting for you to go in another direction and still trust, then the walk with him becomes real interesting.
I am relearning what it means to trust him. I am learning what it means to worship him the way he wants me to, not the way my community or my upbringing has taught me. Most importantly, I am learning to cleave to him by going to the word and reading what he has to say about an issue instead of calling a friend and depending on their knowledge to resolve my problems.
He calls himself I AM THAT I AM for a reason. He has positioned himself to be everything his children need him to be and more. He only requests that we believe in him. Believe that he can turn our lives around if we trust him, believe that he is our provider and we lack nothing and believe that the work our Lord-Jesus completed on the cross allows us to walk in abundance forever.
On my last day, I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel. The commute felt surreal, there was no turning back from this. I had prepared for this transition for months and I was finally following through with his plans for my life and not my own. I was acutely aware as I walked into the office that I needed to trust him. And to my surprise, I was filled with unexplainable joy throughout the day, full of laughter and positive energy and this is the joy I still have as I write this. There was a sense of peace that came over me and I just felt at ease, it felt like I had made the right decision. Alignment brings peace. He is becoming my safehaven and I am grateful to share this experience with you in good spirits. Life may not always look the way you want it to, but it is possible for you to be content even in the darkest moments.
And I hope you, dear reader, will accept the opportunity to experience this joy. God has designed a unique plan for your life, I pray you have the courage to seek him for it.
Wishing you and your families a very merry Christmas and a peaceful new year.
Take care of yourself,
Marcia
